Thursday, May 5, also known as Cinco De Mayo, marks two months of being married! On one hand, it feels like our wedding was yesterday, and on the other hand, it feels like we’ve been married forever.
My husband is a huge blessing in my life, and I’m not sure what I did to deserve him. His kind, compassionate heart is amazing, and he inspires me to work harder and to find my purpose daily.
Our wedding and honeymoon were amazing and living in the fantasy world of vacations and fun adventures seemed too good to be true! Well, that’s only because it was too good to be true. The honeymoon can’t last forever, right?
Marriage isn’t about the lavish wedding or the tropical honeymoon. It’s not even about vacationing, which I’m still in denial about. Don’t get me wrong, those things absolutely are a plus, and I’m one to talk about this. I plan on going on traveling with my husband as much as possible.
Marriage is about the covenant we made before God and our family and friends to serve each other the way God would have us. God created marriage for His children as a gift. I’m no expert. In fact, I’m still learning what exactly that means. I can say up to this point, I have been doing a very mediocre job.
Being married is a blessing, but it also is a challenge. Marriage is a huge change, and it happens without much warning. Of course, we planned our wedding and feel extremely happy to be married (most of the time), but, like with anything else, you never really know what it’s like until you experience it!
I think people glaze over the challenging part of marriage and focus on the positive, especially on social media. The first two months of marriage have been a learning experience to say the least! Two sinful people coming together to live as one can create quite a few opportunities to grow (see what I did there?).
I was used to living alone, waking up and doing whatever, and making plans without worry about anyone else. I could turn on all the lights, do laundry at any time of the day, and work out in the comfort of my living room at 5:30 am. I’m very clumsy, so it’s not uncommon for me to run into things or drop most things at least once. I’m a 95 percent selfish person, and marriage certainly has showed me that. While I don’t intend to stay that way forever, change for me can be very difficult.
Another area in our marriage that I’ve been struggling with is the need for control. I want to feel like I’m in control of my life and of my husband’s life. As you can imagine, this creates a messy relationship. Looking back in my life, I’ve noticed a pattern of starting a project or forming a friendship, and the second it gets hard or feels out of my control, I get upset and want to quit. I know I’m not the only one that feels this way or at least I hope I’m not.
The fact is that I’m not in control. God is in control of everything, even when it feels like He’s not. Right now, I’m fighting against this in so many areas of my life, but most importantly my marriage. My husband is the man I’ve chosen to spend my life with, and he’s chosen me. But, what is crucial, is that God has chosen us. That right there gives us purpose. Whether or not we always see it or feel it, we have a purpose. We all have many purposes, in fact.
One purpose of my life is to be a wife. That means I need to support my husband and to build him up not tear him down. I am going to challenge myself daily to remember that and to live it out. I want to show others how great it is to be married to a Godly man.
Can you relate? Is there anything you learned right away in marriage that you didn’t plan for and that you turned to God for help with? Please share below!